🕯 A Place To Be With OTHERS Who Are Grieving! WE support each other.

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Grief & Loss Team 🤎🤗

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[SummerIsTooHOT]

(3 comments) Oh my goodness Cadee @Cadee2719 , my daughter is trying to send me to an early grave. Laughing NOW, but girl - had a few hours of WORRY. My Diva decided not to check in today and so yours truly texted. No response. Called, left a voicemail. Then kept calling and texting. FINALLY she texts saying she had a ROUGH night. Lol, so I text back that I didnot appreciate all the worry and TRYING to hold off on calling the cops for a Wellness Check. I was going crazy. Anyway, she replies totally hurt that I didnot ask about her ROUGH night. Now keep in mind ever since her 4/11/24 Layoff, she has shutdown = does not want any questions. I need to go to Parenting School I guess/lol  💃💃💃  Can't seem to get it right!!!  🙄🙄🙄  So I am in her Dog House...

Hmmm, did your Son find anything?  🤔

Also, got your Medical Stuff set up?  🤔

Luv you SO MUCH Ms. Idaho,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT , 

I read this question recently and I don't remember where I read it or who said it or I would give them credit. The question you can ask a loved one, friend, acquaintance, etc. is..."Do you want to be helped, heard, or hugged?" I think using and/or rather than or alone works a little better, but I think the question is a great start to finding out how you can possibly stay "out of the doghouse."

Marcy

[Cadee2719]

  Morning "Esteemed Social Butterfly"  😁  a title you deserve.  I give up.  We can't win with our kids.  I just sit back and answer when asked.  If I do ask, I get no answer; if I don't ask he says I am not interested?????   He is still going through the "clearing process".  I guess that is all that I am permitted to know.   YOU, my dear are lucky.  The most I ever won on a ticket was $2.00 and that is few and far in between.  My husband was the lucky one in the family.    The weather here so far is beautiful.  They say Rain, so it rains for five minutes and then the sun comes out!      Yes, I have begun the research and calls to find doctors.  Like everything else, it takes time.  Today I am getting a visit from a young lady and her husband.   She worked for me when she was a student at the University.   Can't wait to see them.  His sister lives nearby and they came from Texas to visit and discovered that I live nearby.  Small world.   I am so happy for Marcy and her team.  She is an amazing young woman and her activities exhaust me.  😂  I have never seen anyone with the energy and ambition that she has.  I am so proud of her.   I think I have "hit the wall" and am pacing myself a lot more right now.  I have felt that I was on a treadmill running as fast as I could and now I am just slowing down, taking my time and pacing myself.  I have met more neighbors and they are so friendly and kind.  My neighbors from CA keep me informed and tell me that the new owner is converting my detached garage into an apartment.  He ripped out a large portion of the stone driveway to lay a pipe to the street.  What they are doing in California is building separate small homes on their property to rent out.  So glad to be 

FROM California and do not miss one thing about it.  Wishing everyone a safe Memorial Day.  It is good to remember the men and women that fought for the freedom of the BEST COUNTRY in the world - America.

[MarcyW882921]

Thank you my dear Cadee @Cadee2719 ! Tennis and water aerobics for me today in beautiful sunny south Florida!

Good luck with your research and calls to find doctors. That is a difficult task that takes time.

It is wonderful to hear you sound so happy and great that you are getting a surprise visit in your new home. I love that you now have a chance to slow down, pace yourself, meet new people, and enjoy life. That is terrific!

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(5 comments) How are you guys doing?  🤔

Walmart today for me.

Everyone, FIND YOUR PEACE TODAY.

Luv you all,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Here we go...another name @SummerIsTooHOT ! I'm back from competition and we came home with two medals. It's always fun, fulfilling, and also tiring. I jumped right into my activities this week, but I'm still not fully recovered.

Marcy

[Therapist4u]

CONGRATS Marcy @MarcyW882921 on coming  home with two medals !!

CONGRATS Marcy

 Take care ~Allen

[MarcyW882921]

Very nice Allen @SummerIsTooHOT ...thanks!

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) Lol, Allen @Therapist4u - I "think" Marcy @MarcyW882921 inserted my name instead of yours!!!  🙄🙄🙄

I luv your posts Allen  💃💃💃

Luv you BOTH,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

---

[*** MARCY @MarcyW882921 wrote:

Very nice Allen @SummerIsTooHOT ...thanks!

Marcy ***]

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[Therapist4u]

ITS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS!!👍

LOL!!!

THANKS TO BOTH OF YOU

NICOLE @MarcyW882921

AND MARCY  @SummerIsTooHOT

HAHAHA😃🙄🙃

[SummerIsTooHOT]

😴  (1 comment) Dreams are the window to the soul; may yours be filled with love and happiness.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Therapist4u]

may yours be filled with love and happiness too!😊

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1comment) CADEE HERE IS A COPY OF WHAT ALLEN WROTE TO YOU IN ANOTHER MEMBER'S DISCUSSION IN CASE YOU WANT TO REPLY TO HIM IN THIS DISCUSSION. NO PRESSURE AS USUAL TO REPLY. NICOLE  🤗🤗🤗

[*** ALLEN @Therapist4u wrote:

Hi @Cadee2719

You’re very welcome!

While my time on this AARP site is very limited, I wanted to let you know I appreciate much of what you have written over time.

In particular, when you said about: “I am sad that my beautiful neighborhood in California became a haven for the homeless, crime and fear” That has also happened to where I’ve lived in my present home...the 1st one I bought, decades ago.

All the good friends I’ve had have either moved... or passed on! The condos changed from mostly owner-occupied who were actively engaged in fixing issues & improving it, ... to mostly renters who don’t care about anything ...not to be helpful, or trying to be friendly, or civil or respectful!

But also the part where you mentioned that:

“I feel safe, I am in a community of kind and helpful people, love my new home,  am able to go any where I want and not be afraid”....

is encouraging ....& I’ve been on a slow path (takes so much time...especially finding the right contractors...& BEAUCOUPS of money.... as you know...LOL) to remodeling ....in order to sell,... & move to a similar situation as you have! 🙂

IMHO: you definitely earned that... by your hard work.... & persistence!

Take care ~Allen ***]

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[Cadee2719]

 Thank You Allen.  I think AARP should address this issue.  People being pushed out of their homes because of the crime, robberies and killings.  What do they do?  Where do they go?  My 80 year old neighbor was killed.  The homes in my neighborhood (a community that was safe for the 46 years that I lived there) are being robbed in the DAYLIGHT with people in them!!!  The

community I lived in was safe for all the years I  lived there,  yet the homeless and the criminals control the area.  The politicians focus on the homeless and do nothing for the taxpayers.  Laws protect the criminals and it was unsafe to go grocery shopping or leave the house.  Yet, all you ever hear about are the homeless.  I am certain that I am not the only elderly person that had to deal with this and yet we hear nothing from AARP.  Yes, to pick up my life at the age of 80 and move to another state to FEEL SAFE was the hardest thing I have ever done.  My son was kind enough to do the same and for that I am appreciative.  The impetus was the deaths of my son and husband.  I promised my husband I would move and I did.  Each day I feel as if I died and went to heaven.  Life is good here.  I am safe, go anywhere I want to go, have neighbors that are kind and helpful and am able to sleep at night.  I can't tell anyone what they should do, but I can say to explore the possibilities and do what is necessary to make you happy and safe.  It is sad that this is an issue in today's society, but let's not "pretend", put our heads in the sand and ignore the realities.  

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) How are you guys doing?  🤔

Drive or ride SAFELY today Marcy @MarcyW882921 and Good Luck with your Chorus Competition!!!  💃💃💃

Jonibee @jonibee , you are in my thoughts today.  👍

Ms. Idaho @Cadee2719 , lol - got that OTHER side of your garage unpacked? Some folks NEVER park their cars in theirs = Storage Facility. When I had one, ALWAYS used it. Nothing like dodging the rain while climbing in and out of my car.  👍

And EVERYONE ELSE, enjoy today and be the best you can be.

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Cadee2719]

 Good Morning    Still working on the house.  No the garage is STILL filled.  I am able to pull my car in so that is a good thing.  The problem is my son originally thought he would want a bedroom set, table and chairs, etc. and has now changed his mind.  He also brought EVERY tool of his fathers and guess where they are!  He is in the process of being cleared for a fantastic job opportunity so he has no time to even think about all the stuff he has here in my garage.  😂  I will continue to unpack my boxes and try to push the other stuff further to the wall.  Evidently, "I" will have to make the decision to call a charity to bring a truck and cart all the stuff away.  Slowly the house is getting done.  I am settling in.  I LOVE IDAHO; it is like I died and went to heaven.  I discovered a women's group that gets together and does activities together.  Sounds like fun.  My neighbors in California stay in touch and I am expecting a visit from a young woman that worked for me at the University.  She has relatives here and discovered I am just 15 minutes away from them!   I have also located a Food Bank nearby that I can volunteer for.  I AM HAPPY.  I am praying that your daughter will find a job she loves and that you find happiness and contentment.  Luv you ❤️  Our Marcy continues to be a "busy bee" and I am happy for her.  All of this does not mean that we have forgotten our loved ones.  I am certain that we all think of them each day and keep them in our heart and minds.  They will NEVER be forgotten.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) Marcy @MarcyW882921 , any Road Trips/Other Travel planned?

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Yes Nicole @SummerIsTooHOT , I am in the process of packing my bags. I leave tomorrow for my chorus competition weekend. I hope I sleep tonight because I am need of some quality rest before the fun begins! 🎶🎶

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

2 comments (Monday 5/13/24 5:53pm ET)

@MarcyW882921 , @Cadee2719 and @Therapist4u please when you can, check your PMs.

I know the AARP Emails "notifying" you of mail in your AARP Mailboxes has NOT been arriving.

Thanks,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) Hey my friend Allen @Therapist4u , I went ahead and removed my comments and kudos from another member's discussion here in the Grief & Loss Forum. You have done nothing wrong at all and your very kind comments touched my insides. You are ALWAYS WELCOME to join any of my discussions. I am heading offline for a bit and see you are online. Didnot want to think I am ignoring you.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Therapist4u]

OK THANKS NICOLE....

TTYL

YOUR 4EVAH FRIEND

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(4 comments) Today is another  🥀  Mother's Day and YOU ARE IN MY THOUGHTS Cadee @Cadee2719 .

Enjoy your Special Day with your Son here on earth and you already know your other Son is with you ALWAYS.

Luv you,

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[MarcyW882921]

Happy Mother's Day to all! 💐 I hope you are having a beautiful day celebrating the difficult job you have done so well.

Marcy

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) Marcy @MarcyW882921 , I have learn't to be careful with wishing folks Happy Mother's Day when I am NOT sure IF they are one. Now IF my VERY OLD BRAIN "remembers"  🙄🙄🙄  I seem to remember you mentioning Stepkids. So HATS OFF TO YOU MOM and hope you were able to spend some time with them.

Luv you Ms. Zumba, Ms. Chorus & Ms. Tennis.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

---

[*** MARCY @MarcyW882921 wrote:

Happy Mother's Day to all! 💐 I hope you are having a beautiful day celebrating the difficult job you have done so well.

Marcy ***]

---

[MarcyW882921]

You did great remembering Nicole @SpringIsSoHappy ! I did not get to spend time with either of them, but I did my housecleaning, went to a park to enjoy walking and nature, and ordered takeout to enjoy a quiet dinner at home.😊

Marcy

[Cadee2719]

  Thank You.  ♥️  Wishing you a Happy Mothers Day.  Luv you.

[SummerIsTooHOT]

(1 comment) How are you guys doing?  🤔

So Our Ms. Idaho @Cadee2719 is all settled in and stopped by TODAY!!!  💃💃💃

And my Property Manager called me TODAY and I can move whenever I want to = NO 60-day notice!!!  💃💃💃

My daughter as far as I know is still Job Hunting since her 4/11/24 Surprise Same Day Mass Layoff at Harris L3 in Florida. I TRY  🙄🙄🙄  not to ASK if she has found anything = wait on her to tell me IF she has.  👍👍👍

Everyone, FIND YOUR PEACE TODAY.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Cadee2719]

  Good morning, Nicole.  Sorry to hear about the problems with your place.  Funny, my son has applied for a new job here and tells me very little.  What is it with these guys?  I, too, try not to ask too many questions, yet he wants to know everything about what I am doing??????  Crazy  I am focusing on unpacking and accomplishing all that needs to be done.  Got my drivers license here, now I have to go and get a new license plate for my car.  Met the previous owner of my home this morning, very sweet.  She brought by some things she took by mistake.  Once I  unpack the other half of my garage, I should be settled.  😂  It keeps me busy.  I have been working so hard and so long that I decided I AM DOING NOTHING TODAY!!!!!!  It is just one of those days.  I keep your daughter in my nightly prayers and KNOW she will get a job that she will love soon.  I also hope that you find a place to live that you will fee "at home" in.  Hang in there.  ❤️  It seems as if we are always dealing with something doesn't it?

[SummerIsTooHOT]

😴  (1 comment) The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

Nicole  🤗🤗🤗

[Therapist4u]

Hi Nicole!

It has been said that this quote by Eleanor Roosevelt... suggests that those who "have a clear idea of what they want to achieve and a strong belief in their ability to make it happen are the ones who will be most successful in creating the future they desire....& it encapsulates the essence of hope, determination, and the transformative power of dreams.”

Anyway...as always... Take care

☮️  🌄  ~Allen 🌈  🎨